I Hate Book on Christian Dating
I promise, this isn't one...
After meeting up with my second hottest guy friend, I headed over to my friend Carmen’s for at-home karaoke. Carmen and I have been friends since middle school, when we’d have slumber parties, and sneak out of her house and toilet paper our friend Johnny’s. One time, mid-TPing, Johnny’s dad came out on the porch with a rifle and yelled something scary. While the other girls got away safely into the cornfields, I got stuck in the driveway. I crouched in the shadow of a truck tire for nearly a half hour, getting bit up by mosquitoes, afraid to kill any of them for fear if I swatted, Johnny’s dad would know I was there and take a shot at me.
To make matters worse, I had to pee really, really bad. I still had a roll of toilet paper in hand, good for wiping, but there was no way I could go until I was far from the lit up yard. Johnny’s dad had turned on every single light. I knew I’d have to wait it out, hold it in, and hope I wouldn’t piss my pants in the process. Meanwhile, this cat kept strutting back and forth, near me, meowing loudly and drawing attention to my hide out area. I tried to tell it to shush, but it ignored me. That damn cat; I hate cats. I’ve always been more of a dog person. Finally, when the scene felt safe, I made a mad dash off the property, and into the cornfields, where I help fertilize the neighbor’s crop.